Let’s talk RSVP Etiquette! YES, you need to RSVP! Why does everyone think an RSVP does not apply to them, that they are special, or that they can wait to the last minute to see if a better offer comes along before RSVP-ing? Most people don’t entertain, have no idea of the amount of effort it takes to throw a party, how much it costs, and the advanced planning and organization required. Being a Gracious Guest starts with timely RSVP-ing.
- Recently, I hosted several wedding showers for some good friends and more than half of the Guests didn’t RSVP. I had to call the couples – who are busy planning their own weddings and ask them to call their “good friends” to see who was coming. Guess what? Most of the Guests were not only planning on coming, but they were bringing a “Plus One” and/or showed up with a “Plus One” or showed up with a baby. So what’s up with that?
- Here’s the deal – if you are receiving invitations, this is a good opportunity to start “adulting.” When you get an invitation, RSVP within a day or two — because you’ll get busy, you’ll lose the invitation, or you’ll forget. And to people who are adults – hello – the RSVP applies to you. Follow the directions on the invitation and RSVP to the appropriate person. Telling your friend that you are coming to a party someone is throwing for your friend does not count. Just to be clear, the words “Please reply? Regrets only, The favor of your reply” — are all RSVP words that mean WE NEED TO KNOW IF YOU ARE COMING.
- Don’t wait around to RSVP to see if a better offer comes along, that’s just rude, and your Host or the Honoree know what you are doing.
- On the fence about a party – decline, but make a decision! Not RSVP-ing at all or sending an RSVP at the last minute is so not okay because your Host has to buy and cook food, buy alcohol, gets plates, flowers, napkins, set up tables, chairs, etc. or deal with a caterer who needs a headcount. That’s what an RSVP does – it’s a headcount. Not timely RSVP-ing costs the Host money and time and makes an otherwise Gracious Host feral.
- Being a no show, unless you are deathly ill, is also so not okay. Everyone has RSVP’ed to an event only to find that on day the party rolls around they think, “Ugh, why did I say, Yes – and I so don’t want to go.” Well, it’s just basic good manners, you gave your word that were attending, and yes your word means something, so show up, and you never know, you may just make a contact at the party that will change your life forever.